BREAKING: Is Nikki Haley OFFICIALLY Running For President? What This Means For Brunette Women Everywhere… 

As more folks start floating their names for presidential bids in 2024, like Nikki Haley, it’s becoming very clear that the field will be broken into three parts: Donald J. Trump the President of the United States, people who will not be President of the United States, and finally – indistinguishable brown haired ladies.

Personally, I love to see more women running for the highest office. It really brings a homeyness to the debate stages. It makes me feel like the White House might smell like chocolate chip cookies and floral perfume. For once, maybe the Laundry of the United States will be done properly. Instead of regular meetings with the Joint Chiefs, the Lady POTUS could have a weekly book club to catch up on the latest fantasy sex book circulating among the masses. Plus, the President already has a driver so that’s one less woman behind the wheel. Delightful. 

Here is my rank of the indistinguishable brown-haired lady candidates currently discussing their bids for 2024. Most of these women have been featured in the leading Political magazine, Vogue: 

Brown haired lady A

On the one hand, I hear this one is really accommodating to men. So that’s for sure a plus. On the other hand, she doesn’t seem to know how to talk. It can be hard for women to say smart things though.

Brown Haired Lady B 

This one seems pretty inoffensive. She sometimes likes Donald Trump and sometimes does not depending on who she talks to. So basically she is just a really good party host and knows how to make people feel comfortable in her summer home. She has very firm principles like her leadership on…..and also……and then there was the…..

Brown Haired Lady A

The final brown-haired lady slightly differentiates herself because she was in Cowgirl Magazine instead of Vogue and she’s clearly wearing a hat in this photo. She is marginally the prettiest of the three as well so that really is pushing her over the top. 

Gone are the days of indistinguishable white-haired men. Now is the era of the indistinguishable brown-haired woman. Glory be to their rise. 

Bonus content: Spot the difference between indistinguishable blonde hair crones