Are These Super Bowl Ads PROOF That Conservatives Are WINNING The Culture War?

Super Bowl 59 has come and gone and because as the ultimate capitalist celebration it is, one of the best parts are all the glitzy ads made special for the big day. 

After a Christmas season full of MAGA Santa and family values, it’s easy to see that conservative values are taking over the cultural zeitgeist and this was on full display again during the Super Bowl ads. 

Here are the best ads proving the culture war has been fully won and that the power of consumers has spoken: 

1. Bud Light featuring Post Malone and Shane Gillis 

After the 2023 disastrous brand partnership with Dylan Mulvaney which sparked protest from right wing consumers, Bud Light has made perhaps the hardest pivot of the year with their ad featuring Country/R&B artist Post Malone and comedian Shane Gillis as ‘dad like’ figures hanging out with their friends in a cul-de-sac. Featuring leaf blowers and good hearted jokes about suburban life, it was giving red-blooded-American. 

2. The NFL featuring men inspiring boys and the value of human life 

The NFL sponsored an ad featuring some of their top volunteers and charitable contributors like Walter Payton Man of the Year, Arik Armstead of the Jacksonville Jaguars. In the ad, their volunteers were shown working closely with young boys of all kinds including those with disabilities asking them to repeat that they are somebody and they are important. The powerful message is not only a Christian one, but it also was subtly pro-life and powerfully pro masculinity and men teaching boys how to become men. 

3. Hims and Hers Health fighting back against Big Pharma 

A refreshing change from the many many Big Pharma ads featured this round, Hims, a subscription service which sells compounded GLP-1 inhibitors amongst other things, invested in an ad which hit back at the system which seems almost designed to keep consumers overweight. In recent months, Big Pharma has been suing compounders like Hims and Hers trying to get them to take their more affordable, equally effective and safe (in my opinion) compounded medications off the market so that they can reap their massive price tag ($2,000 per pen plus) from every consumer. This ad was a way of telling Big Pharma they can’t keep GLP-1 from the population and they are going to fight back. 

4. Pringles with the Call of the Mustaches

Despite the fact that Pringles was obviously cheated by a marketing company who pitched the exact same idea to Little Caesars, the ‘call of the mustache’ featuring several famous mustachioed celebrities is conservative coded as are mustaches generally. I don’t make the rules.

5. Lays focus on American owned generational farms

Lays hit it out of the park with their ad featuring a picturesque, generational family farm and a little girl (clearly homeschooled imo) learning the trade early and growing her own potato. Not only was the narrative of the ad pro-American farmer but the end of the ad featured photos from the real family farms Lays supports. The system in America is set up for family farms to fail. We tax the transfer of property so aggressively that people have to sell their operation before the patriarch passes. We regulate when they can plant, what they can plant and how they manage the plant. We make it impossible for American farms to thrive and that is why our land is being bought up by China. Lays highlighting generational farming is powerful and important to saving the future of food security in this country.

6. Tubi promoting its western lineup 

Tubi made a major debut on the American stage by providing the Super Bowl streaming for free and by all accounts doing it without problem (unlike some streaming services first forrays into live sports). Their Super Bowl ad was weird and cheeky and it focused on their streaming offering of “westerns.” The decision to focus on the cowboy spirit instead of any number of genres they could have featured from their service is a big nod to the conservative minded consumer class beating out our rival freakshows. 

7. Duracell positing that Tom Brady is a robot 

There is something very ‘conspiracy theory’ about the Tom Brady is a robot commercial and that’s red coded. 

8. Carl’s Jr. bringing back the hot girls eating hamburgers

A staple of the early millennium, Carl’s Jr. brought back their signature ad featuring a really hot, skinny model eating a hamburger (that she would have had to spit out between takes). This is self explanatory. Its a right wing victory.