It Is The McCarthy Dunk-a-thon & Here Are All The Best BURNS 

Kevin McCarthy has at the time of this article lost his bid for speaker 13 times which ties him for the second most number of times someone has lost a Speaker vote. The last time the House was this divided over a leader we devolved into Civil War pretty immediately after. So it’s pretty embarrassing for ole K Dawg. 

Obviously, I personally revel in the immensely embarrassing failure of any popular boy who thinks he’s entitled to power simply because he believes it’s his turn and for no other credible reason. Kevin and his band of merry suckups seems to think that despite simply not having the votes, a normal thing to happen in a club election process, it’s somehow terrorism to not support his cause. 

But most of us think Kevin is a big ole joke who should probably just step aside and let his second in command give it a shot (everyone knows Scalise has the votes the minute McCarthy steps aside). 

People are really taking this whole thing awfully seriously but actually McCarthy Dunkathon is my new favorite time of the year. 

Here are my favorite burns to celebrate the season: 

1. This combo of the two most annoying people in D.C. (Kevin McCarthy and Frank Luntz)

2. This ice on Prince Harry which also manages to burn Kevin (good to see ya, Scott Walker!)

3. The elegantly accurate description of events from Babylon Bee

4. The Bee has been really on for all of McCarthy Dunkathon 

5. Kevin is the GOAT of being unpopular with his own friends

6. Gaetz has had a lot of gems but this one was a fun one. Wheel of Speaker!!!!

7. This damning lack of endorsement from the Mooch

8. The worst trade in 100 years and the worst Speaker bid in 100 years

9. Our very own Corinne Clark’s list of better substitutes 

10. This perfect solution